Mary* was gifted, accomplished and compassionate… and if anyone was a picture of someone called to make an impact in the lives of other people… it was her.
There was absolutely NO reason why she couldn’t be or wasn’t more successful… or so it seemed.
She was doing all the ‘right’ things… She was keeping up to date with all of the latest ways of marketing herself and her services and she was investing heavily into her professional development.
It made ZERO sense that she wasn’t further along than she was.
Until we started to scratch beneath the surface.
Behind the personal and professional development, behind the openness to learn from others (anyone really) was a gnawing sense of insecurity and inferiority… all thanks to comparison.
Mary was so open to learning from any and everyone she could because she was convinced that she could not trust herself to make decisions for her business and her coaching practice.
She always needed a second, third or forth opinion.
She always took forever to make a decision and in fact, the entire decision making process was agonizing for her.
She was constantly second guessing herself.
Mary’s business strategy was in a constant state of whip-lash. She jumped from one priority to the next, and from one strategy to the next...WHY?
Because she was CONSTANTLY focused on what other people were achieving and what she WASN’T achieving, and as a result she was CONSTANTLY reevaluating and adapting or changing her strategies in an attempt to duplicate the results other people were achieving.
Mary was a perfect example of how comparison erodes our ability to hear and trust ourselves and our intuition.
In part 1 of how comparison is robbing you blind, I shared with you how comparison always steals and stalls your progress. (link to blog post 1)
Today, I am going to show you how it erodes your self-trust.
When we get too attached to the lives and results of other people… when we COVET them… we tend to turn towards the ways in which we see them achieving these results and we begin to COVET that as well.
We start to believe that if we were somehow different, if we were somehow less like ourselves and more like them, if we did less of the things in our own unique way, and more like they did- we would have more of what they have.
The more we turn outward, the more confused we get (you’ll notice that success or achievement of goals can happen a number of different ways)...
And the more inconsistent our actions become…
And the more despondent we get…
And the more resentful we become…
Our confidence is slowly eroded…
The more we turn to others and what others are doing and who others are called to be… and the more we turn away from ourselves and our own intuition… we turn away from the very thing that makes us unique and powerful… the thing that, if we trusted it, would yield what we are seeking so desperately.
So how did Mary turn it around in the end?
She had to let go of what other people were doing/achieving and figure out what she wanted, where she was going and how she wanted to get there.
She had to learn to trust her own ideas - trust them enough to initiate them, and trust them enough to see them all the way to the end.
She had to learn to embrace failure or disappointment as a rich and beautiful learning opportunity, and not experience it as a measure of her worthiness as a human being.
Can you relate to Mary?
Many of us can.
Clients like her are exactly why I created The Momprenher Mentorship Program: a 6 week long online learning experience where women are given the tools they need to grow in their courage, confidence, and learn how to hear and trust their own intuition ---> all in a way that empowers them to step out of hustling for their worth, stay present to their own needs and the needs of their families, AND step up and into the success they’re craving as entrepreneurs.
It’s the heart-work that many of us need to do before we can get to the head and handiwork :)
If you’d like more info on this program, visit my website: https://laurendasilva.org/page/mom-pren-her-mentorship